| | Good night kiddies! How do you do this day?
Tomorrow is the 4th of July, America's independence day. A day celebrated by fireworks, parades, and all around fun. Tomorrow I will be joining my Church's float and walking beside it in the South Haven parade. Truthfully, I still do not know how I feel about this "new" church that I have been attending for nearly two years. My heart is very torn. There are many things that I miss about my old church, family life. Mostly I guess I miss the tightknittedness that we had, and perhaps I just do not "feel" the knittedness because I was away from this new church as the transition between old and new was made mostly when I was away at college and so it would make sense that I did not grow into the church, but rather grew around it.
See, this is my conundrum - my difficult riddle of sorts - I can not tell if my uneasyness and sometimes sadness is a result of the Lord telling me that I am not in the right place, or if rather it is Satan trying to trick me into leaving. See one of my biggest faults is that I am a people person, and I become attached rather easily, i suppose. So, after becoming so attached to Family Life and having it, and not so far from the truth, being ripped out of my hands and everything good that I had known be turned upside down, the people I came to love leaving me, etc. I feel that I have become bitter towards PT and the way that things within the church were done.
Also, I think that sometimes I know the answer - that I need to leave - when I think about the fact that out of everyone who went to our church, at least 30/35 or so that Ana and I are the only original members left. Does this tell me something? Oye, I get worked up even thinking about it, and my stomach starts to not feel so good because I am so confused. I just don't know what to do.
Does anyone have any thoughts on this, I could really use some clarification, and also if you could pray for me about this - I am definitely in need of some guidance. Holy moly am I ever.
Thank you, and I'm sorry to bore you with this, truly, but I just need some help.
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| | Posted 7/3/2007 10:51 PM - 10 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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